While I acknowledge that these definitions in no way constitute the entire meaning of each (and I am giving away what some women consider 'girls only' insight into the female psyche), I share the following for the opposite sex, in hopes of providing an "I told you so" basis for future arguments for my fellow Venutians (read ladies):
(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)
(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' . that will bring on a 'whatever')
(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying GO TO HELL
(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.
Saturday, September 12, 2009
Nine Words Women Use
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Sing it sista!! - I'm a Bitch
What more can I say but crank Meredith Brooks REALLY REALLY LOUD and scream the following:
BITCH
I hate the world today
You're so good to me
I know but I can't change
Tried to tell you
But you look at me like maybe I'm an angel underneath
Innocent and sweet
Yesterday I cried
You must have been relieved to see the softer side
I can understand
How you'd be so confused
I don't envy you
I'm a little bit of everything all rolled into one
Chorus:
I'm a bitch, I'm a lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your health, I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way
So take me as I am
This may mean you'll have to be a stronger man
Rest assured that when I start to make you nervous
And I'm going to extremes
Tomorrow I will change
And today won't mean a thing
I'm a bitch, I'm a lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your health, I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way
Just when you think
You've got me figured out
The season's already changing
I think it's cool you do what you do
And don't try to save me
I'm a bitch, I'm a lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your health, I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way
I'm a bitch, I'm a tease
I'm a goddess on my knees
When you hurt, when you suffer
I'm your angel undercover
I've been numbed, I'm revived
Can't say I'm not alive
You know I wouldn't want it any other way
Lyrics: Meredith Anne Brooks / Shelly Peiken
Singer: Meredith Brooks
